We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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