I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
