I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
operation harelip BJ is a go
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize
