the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
