Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
