It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Houston, we have a blender
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize