Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
