he thought i was a dude.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
