oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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