What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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