don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
