are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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