Kiss
Puke
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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