Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize