I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
