Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
