Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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