He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
