So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
