i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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