he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Boobs speak an international language.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
