Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Damn victory sex feels great
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
