Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
