My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Shame - the story of my life.
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