? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
