Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We were destined to go to rehab together
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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