Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
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