i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
