take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
