He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
