sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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