Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize