Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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