Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
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