I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Randomize
