dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
