if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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