oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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