Just mADE A PArabola og urine
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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