You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
