The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize