I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
