Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
only you would photoshop your dick
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize