last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Randomize