i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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