Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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