so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
She bit a glass in half.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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