i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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