1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
