I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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