Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize