I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
